Becoming, Elements of the Fourth Quarter
Becoming
It’s not over; we are in the “Becoming Era”! According to psychologist Dr. Cheryl Saban, it is not the ending of the fourth quarter, as our granddaughter has aptly named it. Rather, Saban describes the Becoming Era as the period spanning ages 50 to 75. Imagine my surprise! Yet, as I read the description of this life stage, everything seemed to fall neatly in place. It is a time of adulthood marked by active engagement and profound personal fulfillment.
Dr. Cheryl Saban’s Core Concepts of the Becoming Era
As I read Dr. Cheryl Saban’s Core Concepts of the Becoming Era, I quickly identified with most, if not all, of her reflections. I believe they reflect my current state of becoming Anna Laura and Coach Anna. When you read these reflections, tell me what you think. For those who know me well, what do you think am I becoming? Can you see yourself in this stage of life?
Anna Laura is my first and middle birth name and the name my mother called me when she wanted to get my attention. She would sternly call me by my first and middle name: “Anna Laura!” I can still hear her: “Serious and focused! Anna Laura, get in here!”Indeed, that calling was lying deep within me. Through examining the wounds of the little girl within, I can now hear that call clearly—with admiration and deep love. I did not fully utilize, or certainly never claim, the name until I began writing regularly.
Learning and unlearning have created space for a shift in focus, exploring identity, sharing life wisdom, and leaning into proactive longevity. However, becoming is growing more challenging as I near my 70 year. Still, I will forge on!
When I stumbled upon this information, I was amazed at how science—and social science—hit the mark regarding my current state of “being.”
Shift in Focus:
Transitioning from meeting external expectations (raising families, building primary careers) to pursuing internal fulfillment and personal passions.
Identity Reinvention:
Exploring new careers, hobbies, education, or advocacy work without the pressure of needing to prove oneself.
Wisdom and Freedom:
Combining a lifetime of experience and emotional maturity with the relative freedom from early-life constraints.
Proactive Longevity:
Embracing physical wellness, mental agility, and purposeful living to maximize health span during these 25 years.
And for the readers who are not yet there yet, I would say keep reading, keep living, noticing as I am so shall you be!
Recently, a conversation with my husband made this even clearer. We talked about the changes we have noticed as we age—not from a place of fear, but from a place of recognition and acceptance of this season of life. This acknowledgment transforms our experience, allowing us to treat this stage of adulthood as a precious gift and a time for personal growth.
Having recently read Falling Upward by Richard Rohr, I realize that my perspective on this topic has been shaped significantly by his insights. Here we are, gracefully navigating the later years of our lives—not with regret, but with a profound appreciation for the integration of the pain, joy, hopes, and dreams we have gathered along the journey. This integration allows us to cherish the lessons we have learned. Even the work during this season revolves around helping others blend their valley and hilltop experiences in ways that encourage them to remain present in the current season.
You might wonder what this integration demands of you. The answer is simple: choosing. Many people have inadvertently relinquished their right to choose. It’s not always about people-pleasing; it can often stem from family and societal pressures or a fear of standing out. I’m definitely guilty in the growth era of hiding my truer self, seeking approval by showing only the parts of me I thought would blend in with others. Choosing requires focusing on yourself or rather, on your personal progress and growth, instead of succumbing to external influences. The hard truth is that you have zero control over anything beyond yourself. And when we embrace this reality, life becomes much less complicated.
We often subconsciously yield to the desires and expectations of others, losing sight of our own needs. Understand this: Choosing takes courage. It’s about going against the grain, which can invite resistance from others. But choosing is not selfish; rather, it is liberating in ways that are difficult to articulate. It allows us to reclaim our lives, make intentional decisions, and ultimately embrace the fullness of our becoming.
As we move forward in this Becoming Era, let us celebrate our choices. Let’s prioritize self-care, nurture our passions, and forge connections that fuel our growth. Each decision we make contributes to the intricate tapestry of our lives, enriching our experiences and deepening our understanding of who we are.
So, here’s to the journey ahead—a journey defined not just by our age but by our willingness to embrace the beauty of becoming. Let’s step into this new chapter with open hearts and a commitment to live fully and authentically. After all, this is just the beginning of one of the most vibrant seasons of our lives.
Becoming!
~Anna Laura
IF THIS STORY MET YOU SOMEWHERE
Rising Above: Journey Within & Faith And Feelings
Two books one Goal—You Can Rise!
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